Never been one to let the carrier drop

Okay. I’m definately not a stalker. I’m something undesirable, but stalker is not it. Stalkers, you know, show up. More often than once every ten years. I don’t even really cyberstalk.. I often lock myself out of facebook because the traffic in general makes me sad, I read her blog maybe once a month, haven’t checked any of her image lists in a while.

I just.. think about her a lot. And now, write about her a lot on my blog.

I’m actually even more impressed about my sister being afraid of me. My sister, who I am fairly sure managed to give me stockholm syndrome. My sister, who even after I got done blocking out my childhood I still remember insulting me, tearing me down, physically attacking me, threatening me, bullying me, and somehow managing to make me feel sick and weak and small and powerless. And who apparently doesn’t get that yes, I will ask anyone for sex that I would like to sex, but I accept no. And you can always tell me where your lines are, and I will not cross them. She thinks I shouldn’t have had to tell her where her lines were. Really? With the huge variety of lines different people have, and how good things can be if you’re willing to trust in love and believe people’s lines are sufficient for them to be interested in experiencing awesome with you.. I generally go for thinking the best of people, both in that they’re as capable as me and they’re as open and loving and real. Some people, though, just aren’t.

You made yourself afraid. I never did. And yet, I have a feeling if I had wanted to be a murder victem instead of a suicide, you would have gladly pulled the trigger. I think the reason you hated Kayti so much is you and her were so much alike.

This entry was posted on Thursday, January 8th, 2015 at 8:09 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.