Mourning..
So, I do think I’ve been somewhat successful (granted with a fair amount of 36-hour-orbit-saying-everything-lurking-inside-me) at mourning the ability to be in the physical presence of my friend. I’m sure there’s still a lot more that will come out.. I’m not really sure who I am right now, or what I’m doing, or why.. I mean, I’ve still been working. I’ve been prepping for my band’s next gig. I still feel like there’s crying I haven’t done, and waking up still sucks but.
There’s actually a whole bunch of people I remember that I have no physical connection with any more. One of the downsides of having a mental architecture like mine is a very wide and powerful memory, which I think means I continue to miss people long after they’ve forgotten me. Felyne, for example, I have absolutely no power to find but miss.