Never been one to let the carrier drop

I talk from time to time about how I was originally introduced to the bible as the words of a supposedly perfect monolithic God. Well, clearly it’s not, and clearly believing that involves a impressive level of insanity – either that, or people are reading a different book than I am.

But, here’s the thing that surprised me. *I’m* not monolithic. I can identify influences on my mind that come from a number of discrete identities. This isn’t that surprising when you consider what neural networks are, but the odd thing is I experience the world as if I’m one individual, but in my mind a debate ranges. I think of myself as Sheer, but I can recognize connections with a whole host of different people inside my mind. And yet, I don’t think I have DiD or schizophrenia (the big problem with the former as a theory is I’ve never caught myself losing time – except about a quarter second every minute, but I try not to worry about that – and the big problem with the latter as a theory is that not only do all my discussions with these identities make lucid sense, I can also do things that clearly require the ability to think reasonably and rationally)

So, I think of myself as one cell in God’s body, one row in God’s table – I think of all of us as summing up to something bigger than we are. But I also feel like there are smaller elements that sum up to form me – I’m a bit of a patchwork quilt myself. And I wonder if maybe we all are, and it also seems possible to me that there’s a little bit of all of us in all of us – so I have a little bit of everyone I know in me, and they have a little bit of me in them. And, if it turns out we’re all connected in that way, it makes a lot of sense to me that we’re all experiencing a certain amount of suffering insofar as a number of us seem really determined to behave as if we’re not all connected in that way.

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