Never been one to let the carrier drop

There are some things that simply can not be commanded or coerced, and are not for sale. Friendship and love are among those things.

What is the most dangerous thing you can do to a friend? Being someone other than who you really are. You are messing with both your sense of reality and theirs when you do this. It’s so easy to fall into the idea that we should be someone other than who we really are in order to please a lover, a boss, a government, a solar system.. but it’s a bad idea. Your neural network will be having to keep track of all the deltas between your actions and who you really are in order to allow who you really are to stay alive at all. This takes enormous computational capacity and storage capacity. And, because data stored in a neural network is alive, these deltas will begin to eat you alive. They cry out, over and over, reminding you you are not being true to yourself and your soul. You can not change certain aspects of yourself while you are alive and on earth. These can be thought of as constants, things that are about decisions you made long before you arrived here. Nor would you generally want to. If you’re tempted to change some aspect of your soul, you have likely wandered far afield from rational thought. Cognitive distortions have become your reality, and you are likely to get hurt.

How do you come back, from making the mistake of acting, of being someone other than who you really are?

1) Stop acting. Stand up and say “This is me” even if who you are is not likely to be popular or even considered sane
2) Assert yourself. If someone stands on who you really are, fight back. Tell them why what they are asking you to be or do is simply not compatible with you
3) Say “No”. This is part of #2, but is worth mentioning on it’s own. There are some things you simply should not say yes to
4) Don’t make promises you won’t want to keep at your very core. This is important – promises broken will weigh you down with shame and guilt, and promises kept that aren’t true to your nature will create more of the delta structures mentioned in the first paragraph
5) Say “Yes” to what you would have be. Even if it means breaking a promise you should not have made. Remember, that promise wasn’t really made by you, it was made by a actor who was deluded about what is real.
6) Be authentic. Live authentically. Don’t talk about who you are on facebook or twitter – talk about it in the real world, with real people. Even if you are afraid, be yourself in the world of face to face interactions.
7) Recognize irrational fear. Irrational fear will cripple your ability to act by convincing you that something truly bad will happen when you act.
8) Look for signs that you are not behaving in line with who you authentically are. These can be obvious – landing in jail or a mental hospital – or more subtle, ending up in a job you don’t want or with a lover who isn’t what you want or need
9) Look for signs that you do not have enough self-esteem, or faith in yourself. You should believe that you are empowered and aware and alive and accepting and adaptable. If you think you cannot do something other people do, you have a lack of faith you need to address
10) Use your storyteller abilities. Tell yourself stories about yourself that fit who you are authentically are and what you would really do. Remind yourself of the types of choices make that seem to fit who you are and what you want to do.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, January 6th, 2015 at 4:51 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.